let me love you.

Sunday, May 20, 2007

should i be happy?

i had a perfect start for da day. i saw his message first thing in the mornin. i'm super happy can. he took initiative to message me. oh my! i'm super happy can? lol. oh well. we message message till he asked me out!!! for lunch only lar! but still. super happy! haha.. even though i don't have appetite. well.. we went BK. eat plus study. most of the time i'm looking at him. i love to see him smile. though it's kinda rare. ha. but still. appreciated it. haha. i've so afraid he'll find out that i'm looking. lol. i tried so hard to kept calm. but my palms kept on sweating!! oh yeah. we talked. and that made him find me talking alot. ha. but that's just what i'll do when i'm being so nervous. i'm afraid of awkwardness. haha. but his presence brightened up my day. SERIOUSLY. but after which we've parted. yea. - and i still miss him.

somehow the emo-ness came about when i saw someone's missed call. den i told jm. guess what. he asked me to call him back. that point of time. i felt super sad. sighs. oh well. i din cal back i just messaged back. and yea. jm asked me a question. what if he asked me for a patch-up. ha.. my answer is uncertain but close to a no. but i definitely don't wanna get hurt. oh well. even though i know his answer for this question. i went on to ask him back. at least i know how he felt. and yea. should i be happy about his little bits of feelings for me? yea i should. it's the first time he had sent me a smiley. but the thought that he still misses her saddens me. i feel moody. i don't know why. but i still wish the best for him. yea. i hope he is honest with his feelings. - ' if u love her. either wait or to let her go ' . i've chosen the path that i'll take. it's clear now. but it sort of hurt when i say this? i don't know why. i don't know why am i feeling this way. confusion. should i be happy? you told me i should.

i guess i'll fallen deeper and deeper.. without me knowing..

i'll try. try. i'll try to make you feel for me more. i hope. haha. =) you're important. i want ya happiness. smile boy.

and i just wanna be there for you. i just love your smile. seriously. i just wanna see a happy you. i'll be happy when you are. smile boy. even though it's hard to let go. but if you really do love her. don't let go. i'll support your decision. =) jiayou jiayou! ha..
- like what i've told you. i rather see people happy. =)

some lyrics for that someone.

` but if you wanna cry, cry on my shoulder.

if you need someone who cares for you.

if you're feeling sad. your heart gets colder.

and yes i'll show you what real love can do. -

thanks for being my listening ear too. and. thanks alot for the concern that u refused to admit. i really appreciate your presence. =) i miss you boy. and i hope you'll miss me too. - ya running laps again.

hmm.. i understand how you feel. but maybe i'm not as strong as you may think i am. i am just human. someone who had fallen. who has a shattered heart. waiting for that someone to heal my wounds. and i want to heal your's too. never am i so sure before.

my emo-ness shall end. the pathetic me shall not show out my weaknesses anymore. shouldn't let anyone worry. ha. rather contradicting yea? after saying so much. i dont know. but i just wanna write down how i felt. although it doesn't really matter. ha.. smiley! jiayou. the forever cheerful me!

tomorrow will be a better day. i hope. =)